So I had waited 3 months since having an ECG and blood test in preparation for my cataract surgery with no news of a date. I was starting to think I had been forgotten.
Part of me was quite happy as I was simply dreading the thought of my eye being oprerated on. Everything i had read on the subject was encouraging, routine surgety these days with a minimal risk of complications apparently. However, it was nott routine for me I was frankly terrified.
I did not want to be blind though. I could see perfectly well out of the other eye but it occured to me if anything went wrong with that one, I literally would not be able to see at all. So I rang up just to make sure I was still on the list, and was assured everything was in order and I would be notified in due course.
Spain was really getting into the Covid vaccination programme, and I was happy to wait as I could see that this was more important than my eye. We were all so desperate to return to some kind of normality. I sat back and thought I may have to wait until the summer. Just as I was relaxing into this thought, a week later on the Tuesday the telephone rang and I knew instantly is was the health service as they always ring from one of those really long numbers.
Thursday- blood test in local Health Centre
Monday- Covid test in local Health Centre
Wednesday- Operation at Torrevieja hospital at 14:30
I was fine at first, I just accepted my fate. I knew I was lucky to be offerred this operation to recover the sight in my right eye. Many people in the world suffer this problem and are not blessed with the fantastic Health Service we have here in Spain.
My nerves increased slightly when Saturday arrived with a text informing me that my 1st Covid vaccination was planned for Thursday, the day following the operation, at 8.33 in the morning. I did not want to miss it but was not sure if I would be able to so soom after a medical intervention.
I enquired on the Monday when I went for my Covid test and was assured- no problem.
My nerves began to build as Wednesday approached, but I genuinely was fine until the morning actually arrived. I worked from 9:00 to 13:00 as normal, trying to keep busy to try to keep from overthinking. I told myself how lucky I was with both the op and the Covid jab, again something many people would love to have to feel safer. I think it was the fear of the unknown, and that it was my EYE. I seriously considered calling it off many times during that day.
Finally 1:45 rolled around and my friend Jane arrived to take me to the hospital. She was the perfect person, so calm but caring. My nerves were mounting. I made a tearful farewell to my dogs as if I would never see them again and off we went. By the time we were there and I was waiting to be called I was trembling with fear, but determined to go through with it and trying not to be a baby.
The last time I literally came so close to chickening out was as soon as I was called into the day surgery ward. I was taken to a curtained off area with some lockers and told to strip off to my panties, remove all my jewellry and put on two robes for surgery. This stopped me in my tracks for two reasons-
One ( I know seems ridiculous now) but I think this was the first time I realised it was an OPERATION I was going to have. I don´t know what I had imagined before then, something like sitting in a dentist chair while they did it, and I realised there and then it was going to be done in an OPERATING THEATRE
Two ( even more ridiculous) Earlier on visiting the loo I had realised I had my knickers on inside out. If you like me are from a working class Northern family your mum also might have had a superstition for everything as did mine. No umbrellas up in the house, laughing in the morning crying in the evening, drop a knife on the floor meant a gentleman calling.. The list is endless.
One of the many superstitions I was brought up on is that if you put anything on the wrong way round, ie t shirt inside out or , in my particular case that day, knickers, it would be bad luck to change them the right way around before the end of the day. Well the last thing I needed on the day of an eye operation was bad luck, so when I had realised earlier they were inside out I had not changed them. Now here I was being asked to strip off and all I could think was I had my knickers on inside out and how embarrassing. I knew this was the last chance I had to run as once I was in the theatre gowns it would not be possible to sneak out unobtrusively.
I am very proud to say that I held it together. I was flustered enough to emerge still wearing my sunglasses on the top of my head and was shaking so much I could not get my necklaces or earrings off, but the lovely nurse sorted all that out for me and thats when I did finally accept that I was going to go through with this. I did relax a little.
I was in chair 2 of a row of chairs similar to dentist chairs. In number 1 was an elderly Spanish guy who asked me “Te van a operar la vista también?” which I confirmed. Out of all the patients that came and went I was by far the youngest, and it was quite nice to be the youngest for a change 🙂
Apart from the guy I mentioned from chair one, and one other lady who were Spanish, all the other patients were foreign. British, German or Swedish. And apart from me, not one of these foreigners spoke Spanish. This led to some very entertaining scenes which helped with my nerves as they disappeared behind the curtains and reappeared in various states of undress, either not taking off enough clothes or taking off everything much to the nurses´dismay. It was like a Carry On film with the poor nurses struggling to male them understan, even though there was a picture on the wall in the cubicle showing you how you should dress.
Still, I bet none of them had their knickers on inside out.
Finally Juan from chair 1 was taken off to surgery in a wheelchair and I guessed I was next as I was in chair 2. He was brought back 30 minutes later and seemed cheerful enough, and it was my turn to be whisked away. Down the corridor up to the theatre, given oxygen and a mild sedative and somehow the right side of my face was frozen, but I can honestly say that I did not feel a thing.
During the operation, which took only 15 minutes from start to finish. was the first and only time that I did perhaps think that maybe it would be better if I did not understand Spanish. Torrevieja is a training hospital and the surgeon was explaining throughout to a presumed trainee what he was doing. Most of the time it was fine but there were two moments of concerm.
One when he said: “I am going to ….. (didn´t quite catch what) because if not I am worried that …. (again didn´t quite catch what) might happen”. Then again when the student said in what sounded like total astonishment “Ah really? Is that what you do? I never imagined that”, and the surgeon had to reassure him that whatever it was was correct.
It was a very surreal experience as I “watched” the cataract be doubled and removed, then the mew lens be inserted rather like an eclipse of the sun. And as I say, the whole operation took probably 15 minutes. Then I was sat up, back in the wheelchair and back to the reception area, where little old Juan from chair number one had already gone. A patch over my new bionic eye which I wan told to leave on til morning. .
I was offered a cafe con leche or zumo and some biscuits which was like music to my ears, as I had last eaten at 8 am and it was now after 4 pm. The “cafe con leche” tasted like nectar and the “galletas de Maria” like manna from heaven. I was allowed to get dressed and was moved to another chair as more people came in for the same operation.
I was feeling so relieved. I was trying to reassure the other people waiting as I´m sure they were as nervous as me. There was an elderly Swedish gentleman who was so happy to speak to someone in English he started asking me questions as if I was the doctor-
Him- Will I be able to take my usual medication tomorrow morning?
Me- Er, I don´t know
Him- How long will it be before I get my other eye done?
Me- Er, best to ask the doctor I don´t actually know funnily enough.
As I was waiting for my discharge papers another foreign woman came out of her bay naked twice, much to the mortification of the nurses. I wondered how often they are subjected to exposure of flesh from people who don´t understand instructions. The nurses didn´t speak much English but they shouted in unison “no, put it on!!!” in very practised English, so I´m guessing quite often. 🙂
By 6:30 I was home, 4 strong vodkas and some pasta later I was in bed.
I slept well and was up at 6 a.m to walk my dogs as I had my Covid jab the next morning. I gingerly removed my eyepatch reminded of Jack Nicholson and the Joker as I cautiously looked in the mirror. I had this awful fear that I wouldn´t be able to see or that my eye would be a mess. The total opposite, I could see almost perfectly and apart from what seemed to be a strange lens above the iris of my eye it just looked the same. I thought at first it was a contact lens or something that had been put there to protect where the surgery had been done, but when I went for my checkup later that day the doctor told me it was an air bubble that had been created as a protection and it would dissipate over time. So clever.
Off I went (again driven by my lovely friend Jane) to have my Covid jab. I was so relieved to have the eye operation over with I did not even feel ny jab , it was a walk in the park. I like people watching, and I was struck by how people react so differently to things. Some people just look away, take the jab and don´t make a fuss. Other people are so dramatic, screwing their eyes shut and wincing, coming out clutching their arm as if they have been shot. Haha.
I wanted to say “hey you think this is bad, I just had an EYE operation!!” Cocky now and proud of myself, as if I had never nearly not gone through with it. The next day I was back in class.
I am so grateful for the fantastic treatment I received and feel truly privileged and lucky to have been blessed with both a “new” eye and a vaccination against Covid 19. I want to finish this story by sending out love respect and prayers to all the people out there of all ages facing bravely much worse medical challenges and interventions. You are awesome and an inspiration to the rest of us who are not. Especially to one of my nieces who is facing one such challenge tomorrow.
Thank you for taking the time to read this, if you are a Spanish student yourself you may find the following links useful:
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CONFESSIONS OF A SPANISH TEACHER 